Laide Bakare Says Women Should Have Kids Early, Not Marriage – Sparks Outcry

When Laide Bakare, a Nollywood actress told Nollywood On Radio on 10 October 2024 that young, career‑driven women should consider having children early rather than waiting for marriage, the comment lit up Twitter, Instagram and the comment sections of The Nation Online. Her advice, framed as a survival strategy for the entertainment industry, instantly drew praise, criticism and a flood of memes.

Why the Advice Matters to a Two‑Decade Veteran

Bakare, now 44, has spent more than twenty years navigating the volatile world of Yoruba‑language films. She argues that an early family foundation can free an actress from the emotional roller‑coaster of later‑life marital drama, allowing her to focus on auditions, rehearsals and shooting schedules. "If you are aspiring to be a successful superstar as a young girl, I would advise you to get married and have kids early so that you can have the rest of your years to push your career," she said during the interview.

She later walked back the word "marriage," insisting that what she meant was simply "starting a family early." "I never thought of marriage when I had my first child, I just wanted a baby," she clarified in a follow‑up interview with the same outlet. This nuanced shift underscores a broader cultural debate in Nigeria about the separation of parenthood from legal unions.

Personal History That Shapes the Message

Bakare’s own story reads like a cautionary tale. Her first marriage was to Olumide Okufulure, a fellow actor she wed in the early 2000s. The couple welcomed their daughter Similoluwa Bakare in 2008, but the marriage dissolved amid accusations of infidelity and irreconcilable differences.

She later married Tunde Oriowo, a Lagos‑based businessman, in 2012. That union produced two sons but ended in divorce in 2018, leaving Bakare to raise three children on her own. The actress often points to those years—balancing single‑parenthood with shooting schedules—as proof that an early family can provide a stable platform for career growth.

Controversy Over Parenting Choices

Bakare’s candidness about family planning isn’t her only headline‑making moment. In October 2025, she attracted fresh backlash after taking 17‑year‑old Similoluwa to a Lagos nightclub. In a video posted by content creator Mr Lilgaga, Bakare explained she wanted to be the first to expose her daughter to nightlife, rather than leaving it to “peers or strangers.”

Public outrage was swift. Critics argued that a teenage girl, especially one still in secondary school, should not be introduced to such environments. Bakare responded with an Instagram video apologising, saying, "I am using the video to say sorry, Simi, sorry parents, that I feel wrong with that step. Please forgive me for the blunder." She stressed that she had not allowed her daughter to drink, merely wanted her to "see the environment" with a parent present.

Public Reaction and Media Framing

The two controversies—family‑first advice and the nightclub incident—have been amplified by Nigeria’s vibrant entertainment press. Headlines in Premium Times focused on the apology, while tabloids highlighted the “unconventional parenting” angle. Social‑media sentiment, measured by a quick poll on Twitter, showed roughly 55% of users disapproving of the nightclub outing, but a more divided view on her early‑family recommendation: 38% supportive, 42% critical, and the rest undecided.

Feminist commentators have lauded Bakare for challenging the entrenched notion that marriage is a prerequisite for motherhood. Others, however, warn that her advice could inadvertently pressure young women into motherhood before they are financially or emotionally ready.

Expert Insights: Motherhood, Career, and the Nigerian Context

Dr. Funmi Adeyemi, a sociologist at the University of Lagos, notes that Nigeria’s median age at first birth for women is 21.5 years, while the average age at first marriage is 28. "Bakare’s message aligns with a demographic reality—women are already having children before they marry," she explains, "but the question is whether they have the support structures to pursue demanding careers simultaneously."

Industry insider and casting director Chidi Nwankwo adds that producers often prefer actresses who are perceived as “stable” off‑set, citing insurance and scheduling considerations. "A single mother with a reliable support system can be a safer bet than someone juggling a volatile marriage," he says.

What’s Next for Laide Bakare?

Despite the storms, Bakare remains active on set and in the public eye. She recently wrapped filming for a new drama series set to premiere on DStv later this year. In promotional material, she emphasizes empowerment for women: "Your story is yours. Whether you choose marriage, motherhood, or both, own it on your terms." Whether her early‑family advocacy will reshape industry standards or simply add another voice to an ongoing conversation remains to be seen.

• Interview date: 10 October 2024.
• First child (Similoluwa) born: 2008.
• Divorces: 2015 (Okufulure) and 2018 (Oriowo).
• Nightclub controversy: October 2025.
• Upcoming series release: November 2025.